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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/22517455">Lessons Learned</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hustling_Rube93/pseuds/Hustling_Rube93'>Hustling_Rube93</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Stay [4]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Gen, Grief/Mourning, Hurt/Comfort, Minor Character Death, Sisters</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-02-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-02-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-04-28 10:40:45</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>12,347</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/22517455</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hustling_Rube93/pseuds/Hustling_Rube93</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>The sound of the woman’s voice made Andromeda feel like she’d just been submerged in ice cold water. </p>
<p>She knew that voice. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>(Not Bellamione but used the tag as it’s part of the ‘Stay’ verse for fans of the series who’d be interested to read this hidden scene.)</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Bellatrix Black Lestrange &amp; Andromeda Black Tonks, Hermione Granger/Bellatrix Black Lestrange</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Stay [4]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1574908</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>139</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Lessons Learned</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Part of the ‘Stay’ verse. I own nothing. All mistakes are my own. Enjoy!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It was too early in the year to go swimming, the choppy ocean spray looked cold and uninviting, but strolling along the beach was nice after being cooped up inside for weeks. The watery sun was a welcome change after countless days of grey skies and relentless drizzle, but it did little to brighten the dark mood of the lone figure trudging through the wet sand. </p>
<p>Andromeda Tonks was mourning. </p>
<p>The days following the funerals were dull and miserable; it had been raining for nearly three weeks, the skies filled with angry grey clouds. The weather seemed to reflect Andromeda’s mood perfectly. They knew, they had all knew, that it was unlikely they were all going to come out the other end of the war alive. It didn’t make the grieving process any easier though. But stupidly, selfishly, Andromeda had secretly hoped that if people died, it would be anyone but Ted and Dora. </p>
<p>For the first time in her life, Andromeda was at a loss for what to do without them.</p>
<p>Days dragged on. Nights were unbearable. She’d found herself sleeping in Ted’s shirts, desperately trying to cling to his scent while it still lingered. Or sitting in Dora’s old bedroom, staring blankly at the walls covered in dog-eared Quidditch posters, hugging the threadbare stuffed unicorn that had sat on her bed since her daughter had been in nappies. Dora had refused to throw it out even when she’d reached her twenties and the damn thing had turned an insipid grey colour from too many spins in the washing machine. But the damn thing may as well have been made out of glass, because the harder Andromeda clung to it, the deeper it cut. </p>
<p>In her dreams she would see them. But they were always out of reach. Sometimes Ted would pass by the corner of her eye and when she turned he would be gone again. When she looked for him, he was nowhere to be found. Sometimes she was running behind Dora, but she could never catch up. Sometimes there were flashes of red and blood. So much blood. She would wake up screaming, reaching out in an empty bed, and then, she would cry. </p>
<p>She’d mourned in solitude for nearly four weeks, until she couldn’t cry anymore, until she couldn’t bear another cup of tea, until cleaning everything in sight no longer distracted her, until she couldn’t look at one more damn sympathy card, and tossed them all into fireplace in a fit of rage. </p>
<p>Now, she just wanted to walk, so thats what she did, on the beach near the house she had shared with her husband and her daughter for nearly twenty years. </p>
<p>Her hair fluttered in the stiff breeze that rolled in off the water and she tucked it into the fur lined hood of her old green parka to try and ward off the cold. Tears pricked the corners of her eyes, but it had nothing to do with the bitter wind, and she continued walking, not stopping for anything. </p>
<p>Crying was something that had barely been tolerated in her family. Her old family that is, if you could even call them that. On the odd occasion when mourning was deemed socially acceptable, it was supposed to be something stoic and dignified.</p>
<p>A lone tear slid down her cheek, and just like that, the floodgates burst open once more. She was sick of crying but she wept silently as she walked, tears streaming from eyes the colour of rain kissed earth. She’d never learned how to cry with style, the way she had been expected to. She cried noisily, choking back sobs and wiping her dripping nose on the back of her jacket sleeve. It was less than dignified, but she couldn’t care less. </p>
<p>She was just glad the beach was deserted. Mostly. </p>
<p>Every time she thought the numbness of her loss had passed, the pain would hit her again out of nowhere. It was crippling and exhausting, and she eventually came to a halt, breathing hard and blinking furiously. </p>
<p>She looked out towards the ocean and her blurry eyes strayed towards a wave plunging from a great height. Frothy spray flew, arching, then disintegrated into fine mist. Captivated, she watched the water for a few moments, until a wet, sand encrusted nose pressed into her palm, and she startled. </p>
<p>So overcome was she with her own grief, that she hadn’t noticed the Golden Retriever bound across the beach towards her. There were a few dog’s that frequented the beach that she’d become familiar with over the years, but this one she knew very well. Sadie was her neighbours dog, a friendly, old girl who always greeted everyone with a wagging tail. </p>
<p>“Hello, beautiful,” Andromeda murmured and scratched at Sadie’s head. “Where’s Jim?”</p>
<p>She looked around and spotted Jim near the other end of the beach, only recognisable from such a distance by the bright yellow wellies he always wore. He waved an arm in greeting and she could just make out his whistle over the crash of the surf on the shore. Sadie gave her fingers a parting lick and raced back down the beach towards her master. </p>
<p>The sea breeze created buoyant waves in her coat as she ran. It was hypnotising the way her golden coat rippled, so much so that Andromeda didn’t notice the dark figure making a beeline towards her across the sand until Sadie veered off course and darted towards the stranger, playful and quick. </p>
<p>The stranger - a woman, she noted - sidestepped Sadie before she could plough into her and started flapping her arms at the dog like she was trying to shoo geese. </p>
<p>“Bugger off! I said bugger off!”</p>
<p>The sound of the woman’s voice made Andromeda feel like she’d just been submerged in ice cold water. </p>
<p>She knew that voice. </p>
<p>Andromeda hadn’t heard it for a few weeks. Not since the trial, anyway. But before that she hadn’t outright spoken to her sister in nearly twenty six years. </p>
<p>There was no mistaking Bellatrix’s syrupy drawl, even if it had currently risen a few octaves to screech in near hysterics at poor Sadie, who was running rings around her, barking excitedly, swishing her tail. Andromeda knew Sadie well enough to know that this was how she said hello to exciting new friends, but her sister clearly hadn’t overcome her phobia of dogs over the last two and a half decades, big ones especially, and Sadie was a big, boisterous girl. She couldn’t help but remember the glee on Sirius’ face when he’d found out that little tidbit of information but then she quickly pushed all thoughts of her cousin to the back of her mind. </p>
<p>It would have been funny had Andromeda been in a humorous mood, but she couldn’t even find the enthusiasm to laugh at the look of terror on her sisters face as Sadie jumped and lunged playfully at her. If she had the energy to satisfy her spiteful streak then she probably would have watched Bellatrix struggle for a moment or two longer, but her sisters screeches and colourful expletives were rising in pitch and she didn’t want her squawking to draw any unwanted attention, or more importantly, for her to draw her wand, so she took mercy upon her and snatched Sadie by the collar. </p>
<p>“Right, that’s enough, you!” Andromeda lightly scolded. “Go get Jim. Go on, git.”</p>
<p>Sadie looked up at Andromeda with wide brown eyes, almost as if she couldn’t believe that Andromeda had cut playtime short, but she was a good girl, and after a few affectionate licks, raced down the beach. Andromeda watched her until Jim leashed her and they disappeared over the grassy dunes and back onto the street beyond.</p>
<p>“Horrible, smelly, little mongrel,” she heard Bellatrix say, but there was a nervous edge to her tone now, and when Andromeda finally spared her sister a glance, she could see how rattled Bellatrix looked. </p>
<p>“She only wanted to say hello,” Andromeda told her, avoiding eye contact. </p>
<p>“It was trying to maul me!” Bellatrix insisted.</p>
<p>Andromeda couldn’t be bothered arguing and turned away to look out over the rolling surf. At one time it probably wouldn’t have been a good idea to turn your back on Bellatrix Lestrange — no, she was back to Black, she reminded herself — lest you got a surprise hex. </p>
<p>Or worse! </p>
<p>Andromeda gripped her wand in her pocket anyway and the hazel wood bit into her palm, but she wasn’t especially concerned. In fact, she’d been expecting this visit for a few weeks now, albeit she was a little surprised it had taken Bellatrix this long to seek her out. </p>
<p>“I’m still not very good with dogs,” she heard Bellatrix say behind her, almost sheepishly, and Andromeda supposed that was as close to a thank you as she was going to get. </p>
<p>“Evidently,” Andromeda murmured, more to herself than Bellatrix.</p>
<p>Seeing Bellatrix again was hurting her more than she’d ever expected. She’d been mentally preparing herself for this moment for years, gearing herself up should she ever come face to face with her older sister again. </p>
<p>Bellatrix walked closer, but not too close, and Andromeda could smell the woody scent of her perfume as she lingered near her elbow. A heavy silence settled over them, thicker than the uneasy tension that seemed to crackle in the air. Neither one of them spoke for several minutes, until the atmosphere started to feel oppressive, and when the silence had gone on a beat too long, Andromeda knew she would have to be the one to break it. </p>
<p>Bellatrix was just too stubborn. </p>
<p>Andromeda sighed, annoyed, and asked, “How did you find me, Bella?”</p>
<p>“Cissy,” Bellatrix said simply, and Andromeda saw her shrug one shoulder out of her peripheral vision. </p>
<p>Narcissa. </p>
<p>Of course. </p>
<p>The youngest Black sister had made contact the moment she had been pardoned after the war, turning up unannounced one night at her back door. Andromeda’s first instinct was to slam the door in her face, she’d been loathe to even speak one word to her. But Narcissa had been relentless and had shown up every night for nearly a week, before her desperate, heaving sobs and endless streams of apologies finally cracked Andromeda’s icy veneer. </p>
<p>Narcissa had visited a few times since then and they’d sat for hours, having long heartfelt conversations over tea. Sometimes Andromeda felt herself still being short with her, little jibes and spiteful comments here and there, but Narcissa took it all on the chin, because deep down the blond must have known that she deserved her sister’s ire. Andromeda wasn’t a woman who forgave easily, Ted had told her more than once over the years that it was one of her less desirable traits. But she couldn’t help it. </p>
<p>Andromeda was a woman who could hold a grudge. </p>
<p>In her head, her imaginary reunions with Bellatrix had always went one of two ways - with them throwing their arms around each other, crying, and Bellatrix apologising for being an absolute pillock for choosing the deranged ramblings of a madman over her own sister, or with some sort of vicious catfight like the ones they’d had when they were children, only with a lot less hair pulling and a lot more nasty hexes. </p>
<p>“Andy?”</p>
<p>Andromeda startled out of her reverie and rounded on Bellatrix with a fierce glare. It had been twenty-six years since either of her sisters had used her childhood nickname. Narcissa hadn’t used it once during their recent visits, but the sound of it leaving Bellatrix’s mouth lit a fire in her she didn’t know she possessed. </p>
<p>“Fuck you,” she growled, then louder, “Fuck you, Bella!”</p>
<p>Catfight it was then. </p>
<p>Bellatrix’s eyebrows shot up, “Beg pardon?”</p>
<p>Andromeda whipped her wand out and jabbed Bellatrix in the chest with it. “Don’t dare call me...that!” she spat. “You have no right! No right!”</p>
<p>Bellatrix lifted her palms in an appeasing gesture but Andromeda didn’t miss the way her sisters eyes darkened. “Put your wand away, little sister.”</p>
<p>“Why?” Andromeda hissed. “Afraid of what I’ll do to you? I could hex you silly, you daft cow!”“</p>
<p>“I’d like to see you try,” Bellatrix said calmly, and her blasé demeanour infuriated Andromeda all the more. “I’ll have you on your back so fast you’ll think you’re on a date! Put it down, love, there’s Muggle’s around.”</p>
<p>Despite her bravado and the fact that she currently had the upper hand, Andromeda knew that Bellatrix was right. Never in her forty-five years of living had she known another witch or wizard, living or dead, who was as fast on the cast as Bellatrix.  In the time it took her to even think of something nasty enough to hex her with,  Bellatrix would have her wand out and at her throat. There was no doubt about it. </p>
<p>As for any Muggles seeing their heated exchange, well, Bellatrix was right. Andromeda didn’t fancy a Howler from the Ministry even if she tried to convince herself that it would be worth it. </p>
<p>The tension in the air could have been cut with a knife. Both sisters stared holes through one another in a silent standoff, neither aware of much else except the other. Until a muscle in Andromeda’s jaw twitched and she lowered her wand, turning and walking away without a word.</p>
<p>Bellatrix followed her, seemingly unperturbed by Andromeda’s hostility,  and said, “I have something for you.”</p>
<p>“Whatever it is, you can shove it up your—“</p>
<p>“You’ll want this. Believe me.”</p>
<p>Something about Bellatrix’s tone made Andromeda stop short. She sounded...hesitant, and when she turned around to face Bellatrix she wasn’t sure if it was the look on her sister’s face or the item in her outstretched hand that made her gasp. </p>
<p>Bellatrix was holding a wand.</p>
<p>Not the curved walnut and dragon heart-string Andromeda knew had been returned to Bellatrix after her acquittal. No, this wand was reddish-brown, long and straight. This was a wand she knew very well. Mahogany and Phoenix feather. This was a wand she thought she’d never see again. </p>
<p>“Where did you get that?” Andromeda asked softly, her voice barely eligible over the waves and the wind. “That’s my husband’s wand.”</p>
<p>“It was at Cissy’s place,” Bellatrix told her. “Those bloody Snatcher’s, they took their wands, the people they—“</p>
<p>“Murdered,” Andromeda murmured, her face twisting into a bitter frown. </p>
<p>“Anyway, I found it in a pile of stolen wands at the Manor. I was drawn to it somehow. That’s how I knew it belonged to...um...”</p>
<p>“Ted,” Andromeda helpfully supplied, taking the wand. “His name was Ted.”</p>
<p>Bellatrix cleared her throat again, and Andromeda knew she was feeling uncomfortable. “Yes. Ted.”</p>
<p>When Kingsley Shacklebolt had appeared unexpectedly at her door one cold night in mid March, Andromeda had only needed to take one look at his grave expression to know that the very worst had happened. Her legs had buckled before he’d even had a chance to say anything and she’d crumpled in a heap in the middle of her hallway, sobbing like a child. </p>
<p>There was no body, burned Kingsley had said, along with Dirk Cresswell and a goblin. She wasn’t even able to give Ted a proper funeral. All that had been left of her husband was his charred remains. The Auror’s that had responded to the groups distress call were too late, but they’d managed to salvage Ted’s wedding band from the ashes before it had become too badly damaged. Kingsley had given it to her that night, and she’d worn it on a chain around her neck ever since. </p>
<p>She clutched at it now, the gold ring nestled in her fist over her heart as she looked down at Ted’s wand in her shaking hand. </p>
<p>“I’m sorry, Andromeda,” she heard Bellatrix say, but her voice sounded far away. </p>
<p>“No you’re not,” she wanted to say, but couldn’t form the words around the thickness in her throat. </p>
<p>How could Bellatrix be sorry when she’d supported Voldemort’s anti-Muggle agenda for years? How could Bellatrix be sorry when Andromeda knew Bellatrix had never cared for her ‘filthy Mudblood’ of a husband? How could Bellatrix be sorry when she’d tortured and murdered innocent Muggleborns for having the audacity to breath her precious Pureblood air? How could Bellatrix be sorry when she’d willingly followed Voldemort’s racist ideology for nearly all her life?</p>
<p>But despite all that, Andromeda still felt conflicted and confused. All at once she wanted to run towards Bellatrix, yet stay away. She wanted to be strong and fierce and tell her to leave, but pull her close and thank her. Bellatrix had just given her a piece of her husband that she’d thought she’d lost forever. But it felt like both a conciliatory gift and a taunt at the same time. </p>
<p>Andromeda just shook her head, at a loss for words, and Bellatrix’s hand disappeared inside her coat. Andromeda stiffened, fist tightening around Ted’s wand, but then she relaxed again when Bellatrix procured an envelope and held it out to her. </p>
<p>“This is also for you,” Bellatrix told her. </p>
<p>Andromeda took the envelope and turned it over in her hands. It was blank bar the Gringotts emblem stamped on the front and Andromeda felt herself bristle. She had a fairly good idea what was inside and she didn’t know how happy she felt about it, but she opened it anyway. </p>
<p>There was a bank statement inside, signed and stamped by a Gringotts goblin named Lugrott, authorising the transfer of  5,484,909 galleons, 5 sickles, and 28 knuts from the Black family vault into the one she’d shared with Ted. </p>
<p>Andromeda crumpled the parchment in her fist and bit, “What’s this?”</p>
<p>“The inheritance old Walburga made sure you never got your hands on when she blasted you off the tapestry,” Bellatrix said simply, and Andromeda’s face twisted into an ugly grimace at the mention of her crazy aunts name. </p>
<p>Andromeda scoffed and thrust the crumpled parchment at Bellatrix. “I don’t want nor do I need your charity,” she spat. </p>
<p>“It’s not charity, it’s your money,” Bellatrix argued, and batted Andromeda’s hand aside. “I thought it was time to do the right thing.”</p>
<p>“The right thing,” Andromeda laughed, and she knew it sounded bitter. “Does coming after me count as the right thing? You don’t owe me anything. You washed your hands of me nearly thirty years ago.”</p>
<p>“Stop whinging, it’s done.”</p>
<p>“I’m not whinging!” Andromeda nearly shrieked.</p>
<p>Bellatrix grimaced. “Can we talk at normal decimals, please? I just want to bury the hatchet.”</p>
<p>“I’ll bury it in your fucking skull,” Andromeda muttered. </p>
<p>Bellatrix huffed loudly. </p>
<p>Andromeda clenched her fists so tightly that she could feel her nails biting into her palms. Quickly, she changed tact and sneered, “So you’re still shit scared of dogs and even shitter still at mathematics?” She was being petty now, but wanting to pick at something to keep the argument going, and got a little thrill when Bellatrix gave her a look that could have choked a snake. “I’m no expert, but there must be close to fifteen million there in Muggle currency, and last time I checked we certainly weren’t entitled to—“</p>
<p>“Just a little more than sixteen and a half million actually. Your girl and her son’s share is there too.”</p>
<p>Andromeda’s words died on her tongue and her eyebrows shot up in surprise. </p>
<p>“Walburga may have made sure you and yours would never be recognised as part of the family, but I’m in charge of the Black vault now and I decide who gets what,” Bellatrix told her, scowling. “And I’m not shit at math, I got an Outstanding in my Arithmancy NEWT if you recall, unlike some!”</p>
<p>Andromeda felt her temper flare again and childishly she snarled, “Oh, piss off, you self-righteous old cow!” </p>
<p>Bellatrix’s eyes nearly bulged and her voice rose a notch, “Excise me! Who the bloody hell do you think your calling old!”</p>
<p>“You! Or have you forgotten that you’re nearly fifty?”</p>
<p>“I have a few more years yet!” Bellatrix shot back. “I certainly don’t look old!”</p>
<p>“Really? You could’ve fooled me, love! Azkaban really hasn’t been kind to you.”</p>
<p>Bellatrix nostrils flared, she looked mutinous, but she still remained calm.</p>
<p>It was a complete lie, of course. Bellatrix looked a damn sight better than the last time Andromeda had seen her in court. She was just being nasty for the sake of it. Since the trial, Bellatrix had scrubbed up rather well. </p>
<p>In court, she’d still been wearing the same tattered clothes she’d worn when she’d handed herself in after the battle the previous week, her hair had been an unwashed rats nest, she’d been pale and drawn, and her teeth brown and stained after all those years in Azkaban. </p>
<p>Now, her teeth were straight and pearly white. Her hair was still a rats nest, but a stylish one, glossy curls pinned up elegantly. Her clothes, what she could see of them under her black wool coat, looked new. She was still pale, Andromeda supposed she always had been, her eye make up was nice, dark but still subtle, but she wore her red lipstick like war paint. </p>
<p>But despite Bellatrix’s glamorous transformation, Andromeda’s lip curled in cruel satisfaction at the offended look on her sisters face. Bellatrix was vain. She always had been. And Andromeda knew making a dig at her age and her appearance was a sure fire way to wind her up, even if fifty was still young by Pureblood standards and she no longer looked like she’d been dragged though a bush backwards. </p>
<p>Once upon a time Bellatrix would have probably lost her temper by now. The older woman was highly strung and had always had a short fuse, but despite raising her voice a few times in argument, she hadn’t completely lost the head yet. Andromeda felt angry at herself for being so quick to lose her temper and even angrier at Bellatrix for not retaliating, but she desperately wanted to get a rise out of Bellatrix, she needed a good argument to let out all the pent up hurt and frustration she felt simmering beneath the surface. </p>
<p>But Bellatrix just pouted irritably at her and said, “If you’re looking for a fight, you won’t get one. I did’t come here to argue, love. I came to apologise, to say that...I made a mistake.”</p>
<p>Andromeda flicked her fingers dismissively. “Well, you’ve said it. You can go now.”</p>
<p>“I was anticipating this. Cissy said you’d be combative,” Bellatrix sighed. “We should discuss this, though. You can’t avoid me forever.”</p>
<p>“Really!” Andromeda exclaimed, incredulous. “Me, avoid you?”</p>
<p>“Perhaps I didn’t choose my words wisely there.”</p>
<p>“Perhaps?” Andromeda said. “You’re unbelievable, did you know that? I can’t believe you’ve actually got the brass neck to show your face in my presence. You’re a right brazen cow!”</p>
<p>“I’ll take that over being a mad one,” Bellatrix said coolly. “Will you hear me out?”</p>
<p>Bellatrix wore a look more stubborn than Andromeda had ever seen before. Knowing she would never beat her sister in a battle of wills, she decided it was probably best just to leave. “I have better things to do today than freeze my arse off on a beach with you.”</p>
<p>Bellatrix shoulders slumped a little and she said, “Is there somewhere else we could go then? I was actually hoping you could spare me some time?”</p>
<p>Andromeda looked her up and down in disbelief. “I’ve gave you more time than you deserve, don’t you think? I have nothing more to say to you.” Then she turned away and started walking. </p>
<p>Andromeda heard Bellatrix’s boots slap the wet sand as she stomped after her and barely suppressed a groan. </p>
<p>“So you’ll speak with Cissy but not me?”</p>
<p>“Cissy harassed me for a week before I even gave her the time of day,” Andromeda threw over her shoulder. “Why should you get it easy? You’re just trying to buy me with money I don’t want. You haven’t even apologised!”</p>
<p>“Because you haven’t given me the chance to!” Bellatrix insisted, and Andromeda could hear the frustration in her tone. “Do you want me to throw myself at your feet like Cissy did? Is that it? I want to make amends. Believe me when I say, I’ve regretted our estrangement for a long time, Andromeda! If things had been different—“</p>
<p>Andromeda spun on her heel, her trainers making fans in the sand, and rounded on her sister once more. Bellatrix nearly collided with her and Andromeda slammed her palms into Bellatrix’s shoulders to push her away. </p>
<p>“Don’t make me laugh!” Andromeda hissed, pulling her hands back abruptly as if she’d been burned. “What exactly do you think could’ve been different? I would never have given up my Ted, not for you, not for anyone. Never. You’ve never approved of my marriage to a Muggleborn.”</p>
<p>Bellatrix rubbed at her shoulder. “You’re right, but maybe if I’d been a little more open minded, less stupid, I wouldn’t have disowned you for it.”</p>
<p>“Are you hearing yourself?” Andromeda scoffed. “Even if that were the case, I wouldn’t have wanted anything to do with you. You’re a Death Eater—“</p>
<p>“Was!” Bellatrix corrected. “I turned my back on them a long time ago.”</p>
<p>Andromeda ignored her. “You’ve done horrible things! Unforgivable things!” Then Andromeda’s shoulders slumped and she looked at Bellatrix as if she were a complete stranger. “Frank and Alice, Bella? Really? They were the nicest people you could ever meet.” She shook her head sadly. “I visit them at work sometimes. They have no quality of life. And their poor boy.” Then her eyes turned hard again and her lip curled in disgust. “Even if you hadn’t disowned me with the rest of them, I would’ve wanted fuck all to do with you knowing the shady shit you were up to. Ted would’ve found you absolutely deplorable.”</p>
<p>Bellatrix straightened and rose her chin, “I wouldn’t have cared much for your husband’s opinion of me.” Bellatrix immediately lifted her hands in apology when Andromeda’s eyes widened. “Perhaps I misspoke.“</p>
<p>“Are you thick? Did all those years in prison addle your brain?” Andromeda raged. “That would have been awkward, hm? Ted, dear, make yourself scarce because my sisters coming to tea.”  </p>
<p>“I’m sure we could’ve came to some sort of arrangement,” Bellatrix said stiffly. </p>
<p>“Keep telling yourself that, love,” Andromeda sneered. “What would your master have said if he’d found out that you hadn’t turned your back on your Mudblood loving sister and her Halfblood spawn like the rest of the Black’s, hm?”</p>
<p>“He would never have found out,” Bellatrix told her vehemently. “I’m a very accomplished Occlumens.”</p>
<p>Andromeda just shook her head. “So am I. But we all slip up sometimes, Bella. You should know better than anyone that he would’ve ordered me dead there and then. And what’s the bets he would’ve told you to do the honours as punishment for your insubordination?”</p>
<p>“I’d never—“</p>
<p>“Of course you would. You, the Dark Lord’s loyal terrier. If murdering me saved your own skin you would’ve done it. Typical self-serving Slytherin!”</p>
<p>Bellatrix opened her mouth to retort, but then Andromeda’s wand started vibrating and glowed red at the tip. Bellatrix’s own wand dropped into her palm from wherever she’d had it concealed, her expression suddenly alert and weary. </p>
<p>“Calm down, it’s just an alarm,” Andromeda huffed. “I need to go.”</p>
<p>A muscle under Bellatrix’s eye jumped and she surreptitiously sheathed her wand again. “We’re not finished—“</p>
<p>“Yes we are. Goodbye, Bella.”</p>
<p>Andromeda quickly looked around to make sure no one else was on the beach, then felt the familiar unpleasant jolting motion behind her naval as she began to Disapparate, but just before she was whisked away, she registered the vice like grip clutching at her coat sleeve and called out in horror as she spun into darkness. She landed in her neat little back garden with a pop. There was a streak of black at the corner of her eye, and she turned just in time to catch Bellatrix staggering clumsily across the lawn. </p>
<p>“Are you mental?” Andromeda snapped, turning on her sister with a fierce glare. “Grabbing me mid Disapparate like that! You could’ve splinched yourself!”</p>
<p>“I’m sure you would’ve patched me up, sis. You’re a Healer, aren’t you?” </p>
<p>“What the hell’s wrong with your?”</p>
<p>“My husband used to ask me that at least twice a day, but there was usually a ‘you crazy bitch’ stamped on the end.”</p>
<p>“God, shut up.”</p>
<p>“This your digs then?” Bellatrix asked, completely ignoring Andromeda’s indignation at their impromptu little side-along trip. </p>
<p>She looked up at the neat detached house they now stood before with approval. It was situated in a cul de sac surrounded by a handful of other identical houses. The garden was enclosed by a neat brown fence and there wasn’t a shrub or plant out of place. There was a pretty view of the sea from the garden and they were close enough to see the beach. “I wouldn’t have expected anything less. A little house next to the sea. Cute.”</p>
<p>Andromeda just thundered up the flagstone path towards the back door and tried not to think about how, if Bellatrix aspired to do her any harm, the complex wards Ted had cast around their property would have sensed her intent and spat her out onto the pavement, and if she was lucky she’d still have all her limbs. The fact that Bellatrix was still gawping up at her house bothered her more than it should. </p>
<p>A shriek of a passing gull alerted Bellatrix to the fact that Andromeda had disappeared inside and she followed, she stepped into the large kitchen without invitation and shrugged out of her coat. </p>
<p>“By all means, come in, make yourself at home,” Andromeda said dryly, and whipped off her parka, tossing it over the back of a chair at the worn wooden table. The kitchen was bright and warm, a welcome change from the icy wind outside, and completely spotless. </p>
<p>Andromeda flicked the kettle and snatched a mug that was sitting on the draining board. She didn’t even know why she was making tea. She didn’t even want tea. But she felt like she had to do something to distract her hands from flying for her sisters throat. She braced her palms on the counter and hung her head for a moment before taking a few deep breaths and standing tall once more. </p>
<p>“Whatever you have to say, make it snappy,” she grumbled.</p>
<p>“I told you, I’ve come to make amends,” Bellatrix told her. </p>
<p>“What if I don’t want to?” </p>
<p>“Well, you’ll have nothing to lose then, will you?”</p>
<p>Andromeda didn’t answer her. She had plenty to lose and so much more. She’d already let Narcissa wheedle her way back into her life and she couldn’t help but think if she let Bellatrix back in too, that she’d be setting herself up for more suffering if her relationship with her sisters went pear shaped again. She didn’t know if it was a risk she was willing to take, not after all the loss she had suffered recently. </p>
<p>“Need I remind you that I’m the one who’s came grovelling to you,” Bellatrix went on.</p>
<p>Andromeda finally turned towards her, scowling, “You’re hardly grovelling.”</p>
<p>Bellatrix smirked at that. “I’d get down on my knees but I don’t know if I’d get back up again.”</p>
<p>Andromeda scoffed, “You’re not that old.”</p>
<p>“Excuse me, but was it not five minutes ago you called me an old cow?”</p>
<p>“Yes, but you were pissing me off.”</p>
<p>The conversation halted and they were shrouded in an awkward silence. Andromeda watched Bellatrix run a hand over her face wearily just as the kettle came to the boil and started rocking in its base. </p>
<p>“This used to be so easy,” Andromeda said quietly, and Bellatrix looked at her. </p>
<p>“I made a mistake, Andromeda,” Bellatrix said.</p>
<p>“So you keep saying.”</p>
<p> Bellatrix held her arms out then let them fall to her sides again and said, “I really do mean it.”</p>
<p>“Good for you,” Andromeda said dryly. “I don’t know what you expect me to do with that information, though. I’m having trouble even looking at you.”</p>
<p>Bellatrix looked like she’d been slapped and hung her head. Andromeda sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose in irritation. She knew full well that she wasn’t helping the situation, but she was at a loss. </p>
<p>“I just don’t know what to say to you, Bella,” she muttered. </p>
<p>“I understand—“ Bellatrix started. </p>
<p>“No, I don’t think you do,” Andromeda snapped. “You don’t understand how it feels to be abandoned by your own family! I heard stories, about Pureblood’s being blasted off their family tapestries for one reason or another. I’d hoped my family would be different. I’d hoped my family would put aside their prejudices and still love and respect me.”</p>
<p>“You have my respect, Andromeda, and my love. You’ve always had it,” Bellatrix defended. “Even if I didn’t always show it.”</p>
<p>Andromeda’s eyebrows shot up. “Bullshit! If you loved and respected me you would’ve treated me like your sister and not like a piece of filth on your heel,” she snapped. </p>
<p>“You know what it was like growing up under Walburga,” Bellatrix protested. “The rot she filled our heads with.”</p>
<p>“I grew out of all nonsense. Are you saying you don’t believe in it anymore either? All that racist drivel about blood purity and how the Muggleborn’s were out to get us?”</p>
<p>Bellatrix’s eyes dropped to the floor and she murmured, “You have a lot of time to think about your life choices in prison.”</p>
<p>Andromeda hesitated. Her sister suddenly looked...vulnerable. Bellatrix didn’t do vulnerable, and if there was one thing Andromeda knew for certain about Bellatrix, it was that her defences were always solidly in place. But now, the cracks in her armour were beginning to show. Andromeda took a deep breath and was surprised to feel it catch in her throat. Then her feet seemed to move of their own accord and she took a step forward, but she caught herself before she kept going. </p>
<p>Bellatrix folded her arms as if she was trying to keep her emotions contained. “You must understand, Andromeda, once I was part of Riddle’s inner circle, I couldn’t just leave again when I realised he was taking things too far. So I had to bide my time, and when  he failed to kill the Potter boy and disappeared, we all knew he wasn’t really gone. We all knew he would return. The Aurors were hunting us all down, I knew it was only a matter of time before they’d find us, so I had to make it look like I was still loyal in his absence, he would’ve just left me in Azkaban otherwise.”</p>
<p>“Bella—“ Andromeda started. </p>
<p>“The Longbottom’s were just collateral,” Bellatrix went on, disregarding Andromeda completely. “I just wanted to rough them up a little, so Riddle would think I was still devoted to the cause. I didn’t know Barty and Rabastan would tag along. They’re the one’s who took it too far. They didn’t know I wanted out. I was in the other room consoling the bloody kid.”</p>
<p>Andromeda’s hand flew to her throat and she gasped in horror. She didn’t know that. It sickened her, to think Frank and Alice were being tortured to insanity with their baby in the next room. She’d always assumed young Neville had been with his grandmother that night. </p>
<p>Then their gazes locked, Bellatrix looked completely guilt-ridden and ashamed, and she said, “You only came to see the verdict, if you’d been there for the whole trial you would’ve known that.”</p>
<p>“I didn’t—“ Andromeda tried again, then cut off when her wand started to rattle across the table. A soft wail carried into the kitchen from another room and Bellatrix’s brow creased in confusion. Andromeda swore under her breath and slapped her palm over her wand to deactivate the alarm. “Wait here. Don’t touch anything,” she warned. “I’ll be back in a minute.”</p>
<p>Bellatrix didn’t answer and waited until Andromeda’s back was turned to lean down and poke and prod at the buttons on the microwave. Andromeda scowled and sent a well aimed stinging hex over her shoulder as she stepped into the hall and rejoiced in the feeling of satisfaction when it cracked like a whip across Bellatrix’s arse. </p>
<p>Bellatrix yelped in surprise and Andromeda barked, “I said don’t touch!”</p>
<p>When Andromeda returned to the kitchen a few minutes later, Bellatrix was sitting at the kitchen table. She moved gingerly and winced a little as she tried to find a comfortable position to sit that wouldn’t aggravate the welt that was no doubt throbbing across her backside now. Andromeda couldn’t help her lips from quirking in amusement. Then Bellatrix’s eyes widened almost comically when she spotted what - or who, rather - was in Andromeda’s arms. </p>
<p>Bellatrix wasn’t quick enough to hide her look of surprise and exhaled slowly. “Is that...” </p>
<p>“My grandson.”</p>
<p>“Your...right. Was that why your wand...hold on, you left him here alone?”</p>
<p>“I’ve keyed my wand to alert me when he wakes up. Sort of like a baby monitor. And he was fine, I was two hundred feet down the beach, don’t sit there and act like the concerned aunt.”</p>
<p>Bellatrix’s eyes narrowed. “A baby what?”</p>
<p>“A baby mon...“ Andromeda trailed off and sighed irritably, “You know what, never mind.”</p>
<p>Bellatrix shrugged and the casualness of the gesture made Andromeda stiffen with renewed anger. </p>
<p>“He’s eight weeks old,” Andromeda went on, and her eyes turned flinty and hard. “He’s an orphan now you realise?” Then she scoffed and shook her head. “Of course you do. When Dolohov and that bastard brother-in-law of yours murdered Remus and my Dora you went after them, didn’t you? Tell me, Bella, did you kill them to avenge your fallen niece and her husband or because you knew it would gain you favour when you were eventually hauled up in front of the Wizengamot?”</p>
<p>Bellatrix’s dark gaze flickered between Andromeda and the baby. “That’s not fair, Andromeda. I’m sorry I couldn’t save your girl, if that’s what you’re getting at.” </p>
<p>“Don’t speak to me about fairness,” Andromeda said harshly. “Not when you’re still here after all the wicked things you’ve done and my daughter was taken from me.” Bellatrix looked stricken and Andromeda went on, words spilled from her mouth like vomit and she couldn’t stop herself. “My sweet, brave Nymphadora died fighting against the idiots who you aligned yourself with. Teddy’s mother and father, who selflessly put their lives on the line every day in the hope that they could make our world a better place to raise their son without the fear he would be killed because some madman decided he wasn’t worthy because of his blood!”</p>
<p>Andromeda was nearly shouting by the end of her tirade and Teddy started to fuss. She pressed a kiss to his wispy brown hair and attempted to calm him with soft shushing noises. </p>
<p>Bellatrix’s dropped her eyes to her lap and started pulling at her fingers, a nervous habit Andromeda hadn’t seen in years. “You’re right,” she said gently. “You’re absolutely right.”</p>
<p>“I’m rarely wrong,” Andromeda sniffed. </p>
<p>Andromeda could feel herself trembling. She wanted to tell her sister that she should have tried harder to protect her daughter. But in reality, she knew it wasn’t Bellatrix’s fault. Nymphadora was a brilliant duellist, and a fine Auror, but on the night, Rabastan had got lucky. </p>
<p>“I think she was the first to realise I’d switched sides,” Bellatrix murmured. “Clever little thing. We fought side by side that night.”</p>
<p>Andromeda sighed wearily and thought about Bellatrix’s trial. </p>
<p>Surprisingly, it had only lasted four days. She hadn’t attended the first three, and had avoided the Prophet, convincing herself at the time that she’d rather not know what was going on. But afterwards she’d learned that Bellatrix had told the Wizengamot how she’d renounced Voldemort, and provided invaluable intelligence as to the location of various Death Eater hideouts and caches of Dark artefacts. She’d been questioned under Veritaserum and provided the Wizengamot with access to her memories.</p>
<p>Narcissa had told her during one of her tea visits that Bellatrix had admitted to distracting Nymohadora with a duel during that awful debacle in the Department of Mysteries to keep her occupied and out of the other Death Eaters’ line of fire, and how Sirius’ murder had been a tragic accident. She’d told Andromeda how persuading Severus Snape to protect Draco at Hogwarts had came about after Bellatrix had hinted that it would be a good idea, and how Bellatrix had expertly played the part of a raving lunatic after Azkaban when she quickly realised that Voldemort would tell her things he didn’t tell any of the other Death Eaters because apparently her contrived bloodlust appeared to be a turn on for him.  </p>
<p>Then after Voldemort provided her with the information she needed, she would surreptitiously make hints around Snape knowing he would take the information back to the Order when she realised he had been playing double agent. After the true circumstances surrounding his godfathers death had came to light, Harry Potter had unexpectedly came forwards and spoken on Bellatrix’s behalf. He’d relayed to the court how Bellatrix had subtly led them to the horcrux in her vault by hinting that there was something worth looking for in it (despite mutilating Miss Granger in the process - but she’d had to be convincing to keep her cover. Apparently) and how his friends had seen her kill most of Voldemort’s inner circle during his final stand off at Hogwarts.</p>
<p>Andromeda remembered the chill that had shot down her spine the moment Bellatrix’s eyes had found hers in the public gallery on the fourth day. She didn’t think Bellatrix had noticed her at first, but during the sentencing they’d never broken eye contact as a secretary read the findings of the official war inquiry. The words had buzzed in her ears like someone had cast a Muffliato and she didn’t register a single word until she’d heard, “It is the opinion of the panel, given her significant contribution to the war effort, that Madam Lestrange be released today under the following provisions...”</p>
<p>The woman had droned on and on, but Andromeda hadn’t heard any of it. She’d continued to stare at Bellatrix, until her eyes blurred and she’d gave her sister a small smile. That was all it had taken for Bellatrix’s resolve to crumble and her chin to tremble. </p>
<p>She had felt strangely relieved when she’d found out about Bellatrix’s true part in the war. But she still couldn’t help but think that she’d done it solely to save her own arse.</p>
<p>“What’s his name?” Bellatrix asked softly, not so subtly changing the topic to a safer one. </p>
<p>Andromeda hesitated for only a moment before telling her, “Teddy.”</p>
<p>“Teddy,” Bellatrix nodded. “After your husband.”</p>
<p>“Yes,” she said softly, then she felt all the fight leave her in a rush and her shoulders drooped like a deflating balloon. “I take it I’m not getting rid of you anytime soon, hm?”</p>
<p>Bellatrix looked at her, there was a hint of challenge in her dark gaze, but she also looked weary, and Andromeda knew she didn’t want to argue anymore either. The constant back and forth they’d managed to keep up for hours as children was a lot more exhausting as an adult. </p>
<p>“I just want to talk, Andromeda. I won’t take up a lot of your time.”</p>
<p>Andromeda hummed then held Teddy out, “Make yourself useful then and hold him a moment while I sort his bottle. He’s due a feed.”</p>
<p>Bellatrix’s eyes widened, clearly appalled, and exclaimed, “I don’t think so!”</p>
<p>Andromeda practically forced the baby into Bellatrix’s arms so she had no choice but to hold him. “Just take him, would you?”</p>
<p>“What if I drop it?” Bellatrix protested, her eyes alight with mild panic. </p>
<p>Andromeda snorted, “Don’t be ridiculous. And he’s not an it.”</p>
<p>She crossed to the counter and checked the temperature of the bottle of milk she’d prepared before her walk on the beach, leaving Bellatrix with her arms awkwardly wrapped around Teddy. His face was glowing with wonder as he looked up at Bellatrix, eyes wide with curiosity. Bellatrix looked like she was holding her breath, scared to move even an inch. </p>
<p>“I suppose you’ll be wanting tea?” Andromeda asked flatly, and flicked the kettle again even though it had just been boiled. </p>
<p>“If you’re offering,” Bellatrix muttered. </p>
<p>“I may have set up house with a Muggleborn but I’m not a complete heathen. I still have the manners that were beat into me.”</p>
<p>“Yes, you come from good stock,” Bellatrix replied absently, missing the subtle dig aimed at their awful aunt. Andromeda could tell her sister was barely listening as she summoned another mug from the cupboard and milk from the fridge with a flick of her wand. </p>
<p>Teddy’s little head was cradled in Bellatrix’s palm. She stroked her thumb over his smooth forehead and his hair turned a shocking blue colour. Bellatrix wore a look more tender than Andromeda ever thought her capable of. It made her belly lurch and she had to turn away. </p>
<p>“How do you take your tea?” she asked, slam dunking tea bags into the mugs. “Still milk and one?”</p>
<p>But Bellatrix didn’t answer her and she spooned a liberal heap of sugar into Bellatrix’s mug anyway, and when Andromeda glanced over her shoulder, she saw the reason for her sister’s silence. </p>
<p>Teddy was looking up at Bellatrix with bright eyes that rippled between blue and a shade of brown nearly identical to Bellatrix’s. His pink lips pursed adorably, almost as if he was trying to suss out the stranger holding him. Then his face lit up and he smiled, as only a baby could, all pink gums and dimples. </p>
<p>His first proper smile. </p>
<p>She barely heard Bellatrix’s little gasp over Teddy’s soft coo’s and in that moment she couldn’t even find it within herself to be disappointed that Teddy’s first smile was directed at Bellatrix and not her, because the look of awe on her sister’s face made her heart ache. The sight was probably the best thing she’d seen in weeks. There was a purity to Teddy’s shifting gaze, a deep love, and Andromeda knew instantly in that moment that her sister and her grandson shared a special connection. </p>
<p>“Is that smile all for me?” Bellatrix whispered, completely mesmerised as she stroked a finger down Teddy’s soft cheek. “Handsome little poppet...”</p>
<p>Andromeda turned away again just as the kettle clicked. She shook her head and poured hot water and milk into their mugs. </p>
<p>Merlin, what was happening?</p>
<p>When the tea was ready, she brought their mugs to the table. “He’s fairly taken with you.”</p>
<p>“I’m sure you must say that to everyone,” Bellatrix replied, finally dragging her gaze away from Teddy to look at her sister. </p>
<p>Andromeda sat down and said, “No, actually. He was funny with Harry the first time he visited. Screamed the bloody place down.”</p>
<p>Bellatrix’s eyebrows drew together. “Harry who?”</p>
<p>“Potter. He’s Teddy’s godfather,” Andromeda explained. </p>
<p>Bellatrix rolled her eyes at that and sounded less than surprised when she said, “Of course he is. Who’s bright idea was that?”</p>
<p>“I think it was a joint decision. Between Nymphadora and Remus, I mean.” Bellatrix looked bemused and Andromeda held her hands out. “Give him here and I’ll feed him.”</p>
<p>But Bellatrix appeared reluctant to let him go, she actually looked bereft at the very thought, and Andromeda could have sworn that Bellatrix held him a little tighter. Then Andromeda had a thought and held out the bottle tentatively. “Unless you’d like to do the honours.”</p>
<p>Bellatrix looked awestruck again. “You’d let me?” </p>
<p>“If you’d like.” Andromeda leaned forwards and helped Bellatrix manoeuvre Teddy into a position better for feeding. “Lift his head a little higher — that’s it. Now, here.” She handed Bellatrix the bottle.</p>
<p>Bellatrix took it and stared at it, “Now what do I do?”</p>
<p>Andromeda couldn’t help but laugh at the ridiculousness of the question. “Just put it in his mouth and he’ll do the rest.”</p>
<p>Bellatrix didn’t look sure. “That’s it?”</p>
<p>“That’s it. Honestly, anyone would think you’ve never fed a baby before.”</p>
<p>“I haven’t,” Bellatrix admitted, almost demurely, and brought the teat of the bottle towards Teddy’s mouth. His eyes went wide the moment the bottle touched his lips and he started suckling eagerly. “Slow down, greedy boy.”</p>
<p>Andromeda sat back in her chair, sipping her tea. “I don’t believe that for a second. Narcissa said you used to babysit Draco.”</p>
<p>“We only watched him once when he was a baby and it was only for a couple of hours while Cissy went to the hairdressers,” Bellatrix explained. “We didn’t need to feed him.”</p>
<p>Andromeda rose a brow. “We?” </p>
<p>“Rodolphus and I,” Bellatrix clarified, then made a face as if the mention of her deceased husbands name had left a bad taste in her mouth. </p>
<p>Andromeda frowned a little. Rodolphus had died during the battle, killed by Aberforth Dumbledore who’d brought part of the ceiling crumbling down on top of him with a well aimed Bombarda. Bellatrix’s reaction didn’t surprise her in the slightest, but she knew that at one point Bellatrix had held some sort of affection for him. </p>
<p>“I’m sorry,” Andromeda said softly, realising for the first time that she wasn’t the only widow in the room. “About Rod.”</p>
<p>Bellatrix grunted, “Don’t be. I tried to get him to switch sides with me, but he thought I’d gone round the bend. In the end I had to Obliviate him and go it alone. He was a blithering idiot of a man.”</p>
<p>“Still,” Andromeda said. “Despite everything, he was your husband.”</p>
<p>Bellatrix shrugged easily. “You and Cissy married for love. I married for wealth and influence because it was the done thing back then. It was a way to get out from under old Walburga’s thumb. Oh, we were fond of one another, Roddy and I, and the sex was decent, but that’s about as exciting as it got.”</p>
<p>Andromeda’s eyebrows drew together. Something about the way Bellatrix spoke about Rodolphus didn’t sit right with her. Her tone was more uncaring than Andromeda would have ever expected, then it struck her suddenly that maybe it was Bellatrix’s way of coping with the loss of her husband. It was clear Bellatrix was hurting, even if she was pretending to be indifferent, but Andromeda didn’t know her sister well enough anymore to speak words of comfort.</p>
<p>She decided to fish a little and gently asked, “Didn’t you love him?”</p>
<p>“Not in the way a wife should love her husband. Not the way you love Ted or Cissy loves...fuckface.” </p>
<p>Andromeda laughed loudly at that. She couldn’t help it. After all these years it still seemed that there was no love lost between Bellatrix and their brother-in-law. Then she had a thought. </p>
<p>“Did you ever think about it?”</p>
<p>“Think about what?”</p>
<p>“Having children?” </p>
<p>Bellatrix cast her a quick glance then dropped her gaze again to Teddy. His little hand was gripping tightly to one of her fingers as she tilted the bottle.</p>
<p>“We never really discussed it,” she finally said, though Andromeda could hear the subtle undertone of regret in the statement. “We always said that if it happened, it happened. But for all his prowess in the bedroom and his other various favourable qualities, Rod was...Andromeda, have you ever met the human version of a headache?” Andromeda ducked her head to hide her smile and Bellatrix clearly took that as a yes. “What if we’d had a child and it was exactly like him? I don’t think I could’ve coped with that.”</p>
<p>“He wasn’t that bad. I liked him more than Lucius anyway. But I’m sure if you’d ever had a baby to him you would have loved it regardless,” Andromeda told her seriously, though she was still smiling a little. “There’s no better feeling than holding your baby for the first time, it’s like falling in love again. It’s— Bella?”</p>
<p>Even in the low light in the kitchen Andromeda noted how the colour seemed to completely drain from her sisters face. She suddenly looked rather ill, but before she could ask what was wrong, Bellatrix blurted, “I had an abortion when I was seventeen.”</p>
<p>Andromeda felt her mouth fall open stupidly. All she could do was stare at her sister, shocked and completely dumbstruck. Of all the things she was expecting to come out of her sisters mouth, that certainly wasn’t one of them. </p>
<p>“Surprised?” Bellatrix smiled bitterly. “Shut your gob, you look like a trout.”</p>
<p>Andromeda’s mouth snapped shut.</p>
<p>Bellatrix snorted derisively and looked away again, back into the past. “I was always so careful...but it must’ve happened over the summer and I realised when we went home over the Christmas break and I...told dad.”</p>
<p>Andromeda felt her eyes widen, even more gobsmacked. “You told dad?”</p>
<p>Bellatrix hummed in agreement and held Teddy’s bottle up. “Does he need winded between ounces?”</p>
<p>“Um, yes, here,” Andromeda said distractedly, reaching out to help Bellatrix manoeuvre Teddy into a better position for winding. But Bellatrix had already sat Teddy up on her lap and held his little chin in her hand as she rubbed and patted his back. He fussed a little, Andromeda knew he hated having his meal interrupted to be burped, but she hated it even more when he had trapped wind and screamed bloody murder. </p>
<p>“Hush now,” Bellatrix soothed. “Stop your nonsense.”</p>
<p>“What did dad say?” Andromeda pressed, trying to steer the conversation back to the previous topic. </p>
<p>“Just that he would sort it and I wasn’t to worry. He took me to the hospital the next day and I got rid of it.”</p>
<p>Bellatrix was so blasé the way she spoke about it, but Andromeda could see the remorse in her dark eyes. Andromeda’s breath caught and she murmured, “Oh, Bella. Why didn’t you ever tell me?”</p>
<p>Bellatrix shrugged. “It wasn’t your concern. You were only fifteen, Cissy was twelve. It was easier to just keep it between me and dad. No one else knew about it.”</p>
<p>Andromeda swallowed. “Not even mum?”</p>
<p>Bellatrix shook her head as Teddy let out a loud belch. “Clever boy,” she murmured, and tilted him back in her arms again to continue with his milk. “No, not mum. Could you imagine if she’d found out, or worse, if Walburga had?” she continued. “I can hear the bitch screeching now. What a scandal that would’ve been, hm? Knocked up at seventeen.”</p>
<p>“Did you even tell Rodolphus?”</p>
<p>Bellatrix looked away and said, “Rod wasn’t the father. Well, maybe but...I’m not...”</p>
<p>“Oh. Then who...”</p>
<p>“It doesn’t matter. It was a lifetime ago.”</p>
<p>Andromeda’s mind was suddenly doing overtime. She tried to think back to their school days and the boys that used to fawn all over Bellatrix. They used to follow her around, offer to carry her bag, sit beside her in class, buy her sweets from Honeyduke’s. She’d pretend to be indifferent to the attention she got, but Andromeda knew she enjoyed it, lapped it up even, always flicking her hair and fluttering her eyelashes, exaggerating the sway of her hips, until she had boys following her around like puppy dogs, eating out of her hands. </p>
<p>No one in particular sprang to mind, but then, the list was endless. She could have slept with anyone that summer, but Andromeda knew, despite all the attention Bellatrix got, she wasn’t the precocious little sex kitten people believed she was. Back then at least. She flirted a little to keep the boys sweet and they’d do things for her, but she was surprised that Bellatrix had been sleeping with two boys at the same time. </p>
<p>“Did Rodolphus know about the other guy?”</p>
<p>Bellatrix flashed her a grin. “While I’ll admit that a pair of extra hands can be a good thing in certain situations, I’ve never participated in a threesome, if that’s what you’re asking.”</p>
<p>Andromeda couldn’t help but choke a laugh. “It wasn’t, but good to know.”</p>
<p>Then Bellatrix sighed ruefully, “Rod proposed, again. I declined, again. I knew we’d be a good match but...treat ‘em mean, keep ‘em keen an’ all that. Next thing I know he’s got some skank hanging off his arm. I thought, two can play at that game. Started hanging around with some dishy bloke who’d graduated a couple of years before, met him at one of mums daft little soirées she used to hold in the summer. Then shagged him like the reckless little slag I was.”</p>
<p>“At least you’re honest,” Andromeda offered, and didn’t give the mystery bloke another thought. She didn’t know anyone who would have graduated that far ahead of her. </p>
<p>“Mm, well, I told dad the baby was Rod’s and he told me to accept if he proposed again. I only fucked the other guy once but...” She hung her head. “It was better for everyone if I just took care of it.”</p>
<p>“Do...do you regret it?” Andromeda asked hesitantly.</p>
<p>“I did at the time,” she finally said. “But later I realised that it was probably for the best. I couldn’t have raised a baby back then, not when I was too stupid and blind to truly understand the choices I was making.”</p>
<p>A shiver ran down Andromeda’s spine at the very thought. If Bellatrix had kept her baby all those years ago, there was no doubt in her mind that the child would have been raised to believe the same prejudices that her and her sisters had been brought up with. Andromeda knew that any child of Bellatrix’s would’ve been brilliant, clever, and powerful, just like its mother, but doomed from the very start. The child wouldn’t have stood a chance, destined to follow in its mother’s footsteps when it came of age, probably earlier if Voldemort had his way, maybe even ending up like Draco, forced to do horrible things to prove its worth amongst Voldemort’s ranks. </p>
<p>“Please don’t think badly of him,” Bellatrix added. “Dad, I mean. It was my choice. He said he’d support me either way. But I can’t help but wonder if I would’ve loved it even if it was Rod’s and I’d decided to keep it.”</p>
<p>“It wasn’t my intention to make you feel bad when I said...” Andromeda frowned at her. “Why’re you telling me this anyway?”</p>
<p>“Because you’re the only other person I would’ve told. I’m sure it would’ve came out eventually, I used to tell you everything, remember? Then you left before I ever could,” Bellatrix replied, then added sternly, “This conversation doesn’t leave this house. Don’t even tell Cissy. I know you’re chummy now.”</p>
<p>“We’re not chummy. But I won’t say anything.” Andromeda set her jaw, the question she’d been itching to ask on the tip of her tongue. She wondered briefly if she’d be pushing it too far if she dared, but decided that she simply had to know. So Andromeda took a deep breath and asked, “How did he die? Dad.”</p>
<p>After she’d said it she suddenly wasn’t sure if she wanted to know. She remembered seeing the headline in the Prophet and promptly throwing the newspaper in the fireplace without even reading it. </p>
<p>“Cancer,” Bellatrix told her, then laughed bitterly. “Ironic, isn’t it? A Muggle disease.”</p>
<p>Though it was true that cancer was rare in their world, Andromeda knew as a fully trained Healer that it wasn’t unheard of, but sadly even the best potioneer’s hadn’t found a cure for the awful disease. </p>
<p>Andromeda felt sick and hesitated briefly before asking, “Did...did he suffer?”</p>
<p>“A little, towards the end anyway,” Bellatrix hung her head again and looked down at Teddy. He’d stopped eating and had dozed off, bottle still in his mouth and milk dribbling down his chin. She handed Andromeda the bottle and mopped him up with his bib. Andromeda wanted to comment on how naturally feeding Teddy seemed to have came to her, especially since she’d claimed to never have fed a baby before, and Bellatrix gently repositioned him to be winded once more.</p>
<p>“By the time the Healers realised it was cancer they were too late and there was nothing much more they could do for him except make him comfortable,” she went on. </p>
<p>Andromeda noted how Bellatrix’s dark eyes started to shimmer and she felt a lump in her own throat. They had all adored their father, there wasn’t a man who loved his girls more than Cygnus Black did. But then the thought made Andromeda feel like someone was twisting her insides and she had to push the thought aside. </p>
<p>Bellatrix swallowed thickly and said, “They said that cancer of the pancreas was hard to treat because it rarely showed any symptoms in the early stages. His back hurt. He...he thought it was just an old Quidditch injury playing up.”</p>
<p>“Were you there when he died? Please tell me you were.” </p>
<p>“We all were,” Bellatrix told her. “Mum, me, Cissy. He said he loved us so much.” Then she gave Andromeda a significant look. “All of us.”</p>
<p>Andromeda shook her head. “Don’t. Bella, don’t.”</p>
<p>“I’m not trying to guilt trip you. His last words to me were that he’d always wanted you to come home—“</p>
<p>“Please...”</p>
<p>“He said letting you go was the worst mistake he’d ever made.”</p>
<p>“Stop it!” Andromeda snapped, then she pushed away from the table and crossed the kitchen to stand at the sink with her back to Bellatrix. </p>
<p>She was silent as she thought of home, the day she’d left. </p>
<p>The first day had been the worst, she’d spent it wrapped in Ted’s arms crying until she couldn’t cry anymore in his little flat in Doncaster. Countless times she’d wanted to go back, beg them to accept Ted, beg them to accept her. She’d always regretted the way she’d handled things that day, if she’d done things differently, sat her parents down, spoke with her sisters, instead of announcing out of the blue at a bloody family breakfast that she was marrying a Muggle and she didn’t care what anyone had to say about it, then maybe, maybe things would have been different. </p>
<p>Now, it was too late.</p>
<p>“You know, we all missed you,” Bellatrix said. “We just wanted you to come home.”</p>
<p>“I wanted to,” Andromeda finally admitted. “I was too scared.” </p>
<p>During that argument at the breakfast table, Cygnus Black had been angrier and scarier than she’d ever seen him before. Her father had always been very mellow, if he was angry with any of them he disciplined them with stern words and firm eyes, unlike his sister who disciplined them with her fists, or sometimes whatever came to hand first. But that day, he’d been irate, his dark eyes wide and wild. She’d never seen her father so furious and she was terrified he’d still be like that if she went home. Or worse, if they didn’t let her leave again.</p>
<p>“I was worried no one would want to see me, I couldn’t bear the thought of you all hating me,” Andromeda murmured, and raked a shaky hand through her hair. </p>
<p>“We never hated you,” Bellatrix assured her, and appeared at her side with Teddy sleeping on her shoulder. “Maybe disappointed at first but the feeling soon went away when we realised you weren’t coming back. The day you left, mum sat by the front door in case you came back. She cried for hours until dad had to carry her upstairs. Cissy slept in your room that night, and every night after, for months. Dad was quiet for weeks. Me and Rod scoured all your favourite haunts, but we couldn’t find you. You’re friends wouldn’t talk. Just...nothing. You disappeared off the face of the earth.”</p>
<p>“Rod, too?” Andromeda’s eyebrows shot up, surprised. </p>
<p>“I told you, he was loyal, even if he did irritate the life out of me. He was fond of you.”</p>
<p>“Oh, Bella,” Andromeda took a shaky breath. </p>
<p>Bellatrix sipped her tea, it was probably lukewarm by now, but she didn’t seem to mind, and looked out the kitchen window at the beach. The wind had picked up now, the waves rough and choppy, just like the emotions churning in the pit of Andromeda’s stomach. </p>
<p>“You know, mum and dad would’ve came round eventually. People have this warped perception of Pureblood families. That we still have arranged marriages and whatnot. We both know what it’s really like. Walburga took everything to the extreme.”</p>
<p>Andromeda silently agreed. Their aunt, the Black family matriarch, had been terribly strict and old fashioned. In her efforts to ensure that their family maintained influence and social standing amongst the Pureblood elite, she’d made all their lives miserable. </p>
<p>“I missed you so much, Bella,” Andromeda said. She felt terrible, knowing her parents missed her, knowing her sister looked for her. “How much of an uproar did I cause after I stormed out?”</p>
<p>Bellatrix chuckled wryly and said, “Walburga completely lost the fucking plot.”</p>
<p>“I’m not surprised, she always was a psycho,” Andromeda replied, lips pursed in a grim line. </p>
<p>“Mm,” Bellatrix hummed. “Remember that time we were home for Easter and I called her a cunt in the kitchen in Grimmauld?”</p>
<p>“The time she tomahawked a wooden spoon at you when you ran away?”</p>
<p>Bellatrix nodded and rubbed at the spot behind her right ear almost as if she could feel where the spoon had struck her all those years ago. “Well, imagine her reaction that day in Grimmauld, and multiply it by a million Hungarian Horntail’s on their period, and that’s how raging she was when you walked out.”</p>
<p>Andromeda winced. “Ouch.”</p>
<p>“Indeed. I ran after you, you know?”</p>
<p>Andromeda blinked, that was news to her. She didn’t even know what to say, but she felt an all encompassing feeling of guilt consume her. After she’d finally found the nerve to announce to her family that she was marrying Ted, all hell had broken loose. She remembered Narcissa’s face, all red and blotchy with anger and dismay, and Bellatrix’s shocked expression, toast hanging limply from her fingers. She could still hear the sound her fathers fist had made when he’d slammed it down on the table, and the clink of the silverware when it had bounced about a foot in the air. But most of all, she could still hear her aunts enraged shrieks. The sound still sent a shiver down her spine and to this day she would never understand why she did it the only bloody morning Walburga happened to accompany them all for breakfast. </p>
<p>“By the time I got outside you were already gone,” Bellatrix explained. “I’d barely set foot back inside the house and Walburga flew for me. I was all the blood traitors and Muggle lovers under the sun for having the nerve to run after you. Then she slapped me and grabbed my by the hair.”</p>
<p>Andromeda sucked in a breath and whispered, “Oh, Bella...”</p>
<p>Bellatrix gave her a sidelong glance and laughed softly. “Oh, don’t worry, I backhanded her in the jaw. She obviously wasn’t expecting me to fight back. She tried to hit me again and I was about to deck her but dad grabbed her wrist. Then they were squaring off in the middle of the bloody hall. Mum was screaming. Cissy was crying. I just left.”</p>
<p>“You just left? Where did you go?”</p>
<p>“I can’t remember,” Bellatrix admitted. She had a faraway look in her eyes now.  “I think I just walked around for a few hours until dad came and found me and took me home. Everything had calmed down by then. Walburga was gone, but everyone was upset.”</p>
<p>“You know you wouldn’t have changed my mind?” Andromeda sighed. </p>
<p>“I know. But at least I came after you.”</p>
<p>Andromeda watched the ocean through her kitchen window, lost in the rhythmic flow and ebb of the waves lapping against the sand. She thought she would still feel numb, depressed, shocked. And she did to an extent, but despite their earlier animosity, Bellatrix’s presence had dampened those emotions somewhat, more than Andromeda had ever thought possible. </p>
<p>Now, she mostly felt relief. Relief that she now knew her mother and father hadn’t hated her. Relief that perhaps Bellatrix wasn’t the monster the tabloids had made her out to be. Relief that her sister had finally shared the burden of her secret abortion with her, because Andromeda knew it must have plagued her for the past thirty years for her to bring it up after all this time. </p>
<p>The gulf between them was closing quickly, and Andromeda didn’t know how to stop it, or even if she should stop it. Or if she even wanted to stop it.</p>
<p>“I’m still angry with you,”  Andromeda said as she turned to look at her sister. </p>
<p>“I know,” Bellatrix replied, eyeing her over the rim of her mug as she knocked back the dregs of her tea. </p>
<p>“And I’m still angry with Cissy too, just because we’ve had tea a couple of times doesn’t mean that everything’s rosy.”</p>
<p>Bellatrix nodded and said again, “I know.”</p>
<p>“You haven’t even said you’re sorry,” Andromeda pointed out stonily. </p>
<p>Bellatrix looked amused at that but said, “Somehow sorry didn’t seem quite sufficient.”</p>
<p>Andromeda snorted at that and said, “You know, after Cissy hounded me for days and I finally gave in, I knew it wouldn’t be long before you made an appearance. I just didn’t imagine our reunion to be quite like this.”</p>
<p>Bellatrix laughed a little and hoisted Teddy a little higher on her hip. “What were you expecting? A fight to the death?”</p>
<p>“Something like that,” Andromeda muttered, flashes of their imaginary brawl racing through her mind. “If I’m being honest, I was expecting that famous temper of yours to make an appearance.”</p>
<p>Bellatrix’s dark eyes glinted, “I told you, Cissy said you’d been spoiling for a fight, so I took a Calming Draught before I came.”</p>
<p>Andromeda barked a laugh. “You sly bitch. We could’ve had some fun slapping each other around.”</p>
<p>“Well, just so you know, I would’ve won,” Bellatrix jeered good-naturedly.  </p>
<p>“In a duel maybe, but an all out catfight I’d beat the shit out of you, love.”</p>
<p>Bellatrix laughed loudly, jostling Teddy a little, but he slept on. Andromeda couldn’t help but think how much she’d missed that laugh. Missed this. The easy banter that flowed between them was nice, familiar. </p>
<p>“You’re hilarious, darling,” Bellatrix chuckled. </p>
<p>A part of Andromeda knew that she should have been angry at herself. She felt like she’d let her sisters off the hook much too easily, but another part of her was just tired. So tired. There was little doubt in her mind that her relationship with her sisters had been damaged, but hopefully not beyond repair. </p>
<p>She knew it was going to take more than a brew and a few million galleons to recover what had been lost, but the hostility had to stop. After the war, after everything they’d all lost, it was time to stop. </p>
<p>“Andy?” Bellatrix said, finally using the nickname again after Andromeda’s earlier outburst on the beach. She cupped her sisters cheek with her palm and swiped her thumb under Andromeda’s eye, brushing away a stray tear. Andromeda didn’t even realise she’d started crying. “No matter what, mum and dad never stopped loving you. Even after everything that happened that day, they were always so very proud of you. Especially when they heard about all the wonderful things you’d did with you life.”</p>
<p>Andromeda choked a little, but despite the tears clinging to her dark lashes, Andromeda covered her sisters hand in hers and the only thing she could think to say was, “Would you like another brew? You didn’t really get to enjoy the last one.”</p>
<p>Bellatrix smiled in a way that made her eyes crinkle, in a way that made her look like the sister Andromeda had dearly missed and nothing like the raving lunatic she had led people to believe she was.</p>
<p>“Give him here,” Andromeda said, and held out her hands for Teddy. “I’ll quickly change him and put him in his cot.”</p>
<p>Bellatrix looked relieved as they gently exchanged the sleeping baby. “I thought you’d never ask, my arm’s went numb.”</p>
<p>Andromeda chuckled, “Yes, he’s heavier than he looks.” Then she nodded at the kettle and said, “Just flick that switch down, there should be enough water for more tea. I’ll be back in a minute.”</p>
<p>“All right,” Bellatrix said, then in a strangled voice called out to Andromeda’s retreating back, “Andy.”</p>
<p>Andromeda turned. Bellatrix was staring at her quite intensely, and the elder witch hesitantly said, “I’ve been given a second chance, even though many believe I don’t deserve one. If you’d permit me...may I visit you again? I’d like to spend more time with Teddy. Get to know him. He is my nephew after all. If we can agree to disagree on our politics, that is. What do you say?” She looked hopeful. “Kiss and make up? I don’t want to live with anymore regrets.”</p>
<p>Ted was gone, Nymphadora was gone, even Remus, who had been the closest thing she’d ever had to a son, was gone. She knew that recovering from her loss would be hard, but she still had Teddy, and somehow, she had ended up with her sisters now too. </p>
<p>Andromeda felt her mouth curve into a genuine smile, “No regrets, Bella. Just lessons learned.”</p>
<p> Bellatrix’s shoulders drooped as if she’d been holding her breath waiting for Andromeda’s answer,  but her reply was clearly all the older witch had needed, and she smiled warmly.</p>
<p>No, Andromeda’s relationship with Bellatrix and Narcissa was far from perfect, and she knew it would never be what it once was, but in that moment, everything seemed right with the world.</p>
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